I believe the small, still voice within our hearts is the voice of our soul, or of a higher energy, telling us the things that we, who are connected to everything in the universe, already know. We were born knowing but soon forgot our connection as we learned to live on this earth.
I’ll be the first to admit I’ve got a long way to go with listening to that small, still voice within me. Truth is, the only time I really hear it clearly is when I’m writing. I’m so busy listening to the party going on in my head, how could I hear a small, still voice of knowing?
However, since I was first struck with vertigo three weeks ago now (yes, it’s still going on), I’ve had a feeling that this dizziness is something more.
This dizziness I’m feeling is the still, small voice within my heart speaking to me. I believe it is a symptom of the energetic shifts that are going on in the world right now, and the dizziness is a way to make me stop, listen, and allow it to happen.
THAT SMALL, STILL VOICE IS SOMETHING GREATER THAN US TRYING TO GET US TO HEAR
For a little over a year now, I’ve gone through some huge changes within myself. I’m exploring what Writing From the Heart is in this weekly blog because of these changes. I’ve found my calling in helping others to heal their lives through the healing power of personal storytelling. I’ve been working through the stories I’ve told myself my entire life, and through it, I’ve been healing myself. I believe I’ll be writing to heal myself until the day I die. However, in living this past year, I’ve also come up against some of my demons and have probably sabotaged myself as often as I’ve helped myself.
If I had a dollar for every time I’ve been told I have to — let go, allow it to happen, lift my paddle, let myself fall, go with the flow, allow my inner queen to shine, step into my power, embrace the goddess within, yada yada yada — well let’s suffice it to say that I would have had a hugely better year financially!
But how do we let go and allow what is supposed to happen — to happen?
FIRST SCULLY, NOW DOGGETT
I’ve been binge-watching X-Files with my hubby for the last month or so. I was never into the X-Files in the 90s, but now I see things in it that I believe. Eight seasons and a movie later, I was seriously losing patience with Scully and her neverending disbelief in anything but fact and proven science. And now in season 9, a new character, Doggett (the fill-in Mulder) has become the doubting Thomas, and suddenly Scully is the believer! What?! Why the change of heart Scully?
And then it struck me like a bolt of ironic lightning… I’m no different than Scully or Doggett. I’ve seen and felt things I can’t explain and yet I’m so afraid I still won’t allow myself to do what I’m meant to do. Scully made the big leap and she’s better for it, why can’t I?
THAT SMALL, STILL VOICE IS NOT ABOVE SCREAMING (OR MUCH WORSE) TO MAKE YOU LISTEN
That small, still voice and every other sign have been telling me for the past year that Writing From the Heart is about healing, and that I am a healer, but I’ve been afraid to listen. So, the Universe gave me something to make me pay attention — vertigo.
I have to stop running away from embracing the changes that need to happen to me to make me better at what I love to do — helping people tell their stories.
I’m grateful that it’s only vertigo, and not a life-threatening illness and three car accidents that is making me stop and allow. That’s what my dear friend EagleSpirit had to go through before she finally accepted who she was meant to be.
THE TRUTH IS IN HERE (NOT OUT THERE)
Try this: Put your hand over your heart. Now take a few deep, lung-filling breaths. Doesn’t that feel better? You are now present in your body. Try this whenever you feel stressed or unsure. Put your hand over your heart to bring to you back to awareness.
We as humans spend so much of our time searching for the truth outside of ourselves. But, as a link in the connected and interdependent universe, we already know. We just think we don’t because we’ve been told our still, small voice is not to be trusted.
We are taught to look outside ourselves, to the prophets and the healers, for knowledge. But who knows us better than ourselves? No one. If we believe.
WRITE TO FIND ANSWERS
Last week I had a treatment to get rid of my vertigo. But the next morning, and the morning after, I still felt dizzy, and I still have dizziness a week later. But it’s different from what I was feeling before. Now I believe that the treatment was a success — my vertigo is actually gone. What is left behind is the dizziness I’m feeling (among other symptoms) from the energetic shifts that are happening inside me.
I’ve been seeking clarity for months so that I can move forward with confidence. It all seemed to come to a head last week. So what did I do, but turn to my journal — the one place where I find stillness. Within that stillness is clarity. I wrote for at least two hours, resisting, cursing, and not wanting to believe. Until I finally gave in and listened.
I checked every single message my heart told me with a pendulum to find out if what I understood I was to do was in the highest good.
And it was.
I felt empty of the fear and doubt that have plagued for a year. I am ready to allow.
Now when I feel dizzy, I do my best to stop, listen, and check within. Lately, it’s been that small, still voice wanting me to hear. I’m beginning to trust that I really do have all the answers within me.